That person is also using some of my friends name to tag on my blog .
So dont be shocked if you see it .
I must have offended some ugly people who is jealous of my hotness
Or some no lifer who just cant do what i can do .
May i beg god to forgive this pitiful soul .
make him a life that he doesnt think of me as a guy that is so hot to the extent he must do this in spite .
even if he is a sucker , please cure his mentally damaged mind .
i shall use my wonder shit to exchange into his wonder life
it's worth is like a diamond compared to dirt .
ah . . never ending . .
-GuoLun
Danger and Delight grows on one stalk
8:23 AM
Monday, March 30, 2009
Aw .
Today i felt i really have to be independent . That's what counts in the end .
It's like so many feeling mixed together .
Angry , Sad , Regret , Happy .
Topsy turvy .
Saw like so many buddies who graduated today .
I dunno why but it's like a total coincidence .
ah . . lets get out of this mood .
hmmm . .
Lets joke* then .
Imma gonna do this to an extent .
STRICT WARNING : Before reading please follow these instructions carefully or you may result in a fatal tragedy
1)Continue if you find me a hottie .
2)Continue if you find me a hottie .
3)Continue if you find me a hottie .
Ok . What you're gonna see below is neither a human nor an animal .
It's not the human evolution . . .
Not a Brazil telephone repair man . . .
not a Super Saiyan . . .
nor your neighborhood underwear thief . . .
YES!!
It's your one and only Guardian Angel !!!!
Aw . . Just look at his lollipop . and his heart shaped necklace which represent his love for you
Dont you feel like pinching his chubby face.
You could never want more once you have him by your side.
Ain't him cute ?
He reminds me of doraemon .
Did his nose grew bigger and flatter? But its a fact he grew thinner
-GuoLun
Throw it all out !
6:08 AM
Saturday, March 28, 2009
Ahh .
Digkwid .
Today we won the match against that china team - YMCA . with a shame of 84-49
i expected it to be 10000-0
. . . . just not my day . .
I ran only about 3mins and i was tired already .
And there was this stupid guy which i think is their key star player
He is freaking fat , sweaty , slimy and above all china .
He got this never before seen skill - crouching cow hidden milk
This skill made him able to slip through under my armpit easily then when i want to box him out i realise i was like pushing a fragging pregnant cow .
Hmmm .
Some of their player's face seems to be screwed . . . or they are .
Luckily they aren't a stench emitter like what legends foretold . or isit my blocked nose?
And our prize was a fragging $75 cash .
but
Shared amongst us .
and those who nvr play didnt get the money .
So , now i am richer by $8
And that could last me for a couple of donation drives .
So , now i'm gonna decay at home . . aw rain . damn . sleeping time .
-GuoLun
11:25 PM
LOL
today was super fun.
And it's really a day of telling if you are charming or not.
And of course , it was proven that i am the most charming .
So , we went to Bishan to prawn and guess what ?
Like 30 ppl there are struggling just to get a shrimp and when i just anyhow put in my rod for 10secs , I got a 5kg super big lobster .
It's about 15cm . and it got long and blue pincers .
But . . . its a dead one . And that was super funny .
People around was so shocked that i was so pro and i can tell from their face they want my autograph !!!
But of course i was humble n did not give .
Then we prawned til like 1030 .
And i got 4 prawns .
i think my gay kelvin got 3 and ardi got 2
Altogether got 26 of them . Then we BBQ them
It was super nice . especially my 15kg lobster
can u imagine you bit like so crunchy
then so fresh like it's talking to you
and so gigantic like the kfc drumsrick
But sadly ardi went off 1st and he did not eat any . he just miss one of his chance in his life to dine with me .
I wanna go there again with my friends in the future !!!
.
Anyway , I ponten my training today just to prawn . LOL I think some people are furious And tmr sunday got match with dunno what team . I heard it's YMCA .
Rmb to wish me good luck .
hopefully i am not a burden in tmr match . !!
-GuoLun
8:52 AM
Friday, March 27, 2009
OK my nose is like raping me .
I feel like crap .
And i feel like dying .
ah whatever . . .
I wanna talk about the ' Earth Day '
Where we off our lights on 28 march 09 from 830 to 930
I think this is useless
Does saving an hour really lead to an hour more of survival ? Increasing our awareness doesn't mean that we could stop it .
We are aware of global terrorism but to what extent of success have we put a stop to it ?
Isn't saving an hour of electricity a huge risk to take? The afternoon knows what the morning never suspected .
Are we contributing this amount of electricity to people who use it wisely or otherwise ?
How sure are you that buying time for survival of mankind could lead to a better future?
Or could it lead to a draggy death upon us ?( Eg. war , natural disaster , pandemic . This all happens more often in the future)
Why are we saving this amount of electricity for ?
A piece of knowledge ? A future that stills contribute to Global Warming ? A chance for people who use this time for henious deeds?
Everything still comes back to square one
This is just my opinion . You are free to choose , but the choices you make today will determine what you will have , be and do in the tomorrow of your life .
If able , keep your humble comments to yourself . Thanks.
-GuoLun
In the long run , we get no more than what we have been willing to risk giving
6:37 AM
Thursday, March 26, 2009
Alright Alright
I know you despos wants to read my new post
and it's all mainly due to my . . my . . ahem*
You get it dont cha ? Yea! My life .
What were you thinking ? My Pimpleless face ? My Hunkyness ? My Dodo balls ?
Nah !
Although they were less than the truth But I'm a very humble and innocent child ok .
Unlike some people who say they are but they are not . . . dunno who ( quite familiar ah ).
You guys must be more like me , humble !
For example , for my face , I can feel the natural wind blowing on every cell . So cooling and feels so smooth like eating ice cream that slides down your gullet
See , it's like better than lying to the whole world that my face is covered with pimples and i cant enjoy the cooling breeze
Aww . . wasted for some saddist. .
Nvm ask me if you want to know the feeling , I will gladly demonstrate and tell you.
Ok , lets get into more serious matter .
I am sick today . And some people insist on not believing Thanks to my humbleness
But nvm . My humble intuition tells me to forgive you polka cherries
AND what's gonna come up next is playing that stupid game of catching with SHRIMPS
I'm gonna go catch prawns this weekend
Um . . I will post more soon cus I'm like down with flu?
So dont miss me too much or you will get overly streesed up which will lead to more growth of unwanted facial particles .
Anyway , I took this test on facebook and I think it's 95% true man
June
Thinks far with vision. Easily influenced by kindness. Polite and soft-spoken. Having lots of ideas. Sensitive. Active mind. Hesitating, tends to delay. Choosy and always wants the best. Temperamental. Funny and humorous. Loves to joke. Good debating skills. Talkative. Daydreamer. Friendly. Knows how to make friends. Abiding. Able to show character. Easily hurt. Prone to getting colds. Loves to dress up. Easily bored. Fussy. Seldom shows emotions. Takes time to recover when hurt. Brand conscious. Executive. Stubborn.
-GuoLun
4:04 AM
Sunday, March 22, 2009
HAHA .
So it's the end of the holidays and life's gonna suck big time again .
Anyway this holiday was alot more exciting , thrilling and outdoorsy than expected. More of a crime in a friend's bed
although i learnt nothing except the fact that people do really change like from a puppy to a dog ( I'm talking about somebody whose country is inbetween Thai and SG )
Whatever Kumar. You just don't rock ma boat
As for me , I'm still constantly trying hard to improve on my IQ in case some GUY trick me into sleeping with him in an enclosed aircon room again.
OK , I'll be getting serious now. And I'm gonna play a part for your safety .
I'm gonna talk about the dangers and wonders you will face when you get hold of my photograph or autograph
with my photo or autograph , you put any where , the thing will become branded. Put in your wallet , it becomes branded Put in your mouth , everyone wants you to talk Put in your butt crack , Everyone wants to pinch . Put at your face , all people want to take picture with you (my picture actually) . But of course , the owner will be dramatically neglected .
And it has a 2 in 1 function . Other than making things more branded than Gucci Levis etc , It's like a life time guaranteed ward against pimples .
And that's what really makes it a top priority in your wanted list and it would most likely be the next trend for teens to have a picture of me wherever they go .
Hanving my face as some tattoos , my face on their clothes , celebrities changing their name into my name , My name as some new brands , etc .
Also ,
You might get addicted into looking at my pic So much that you do it in the park , dining table , bathroom , most importantly , your bed and more of course , It'll be the end of the your life if i wrote everything
Once you get hold of my picture , don't be surprised if you feel like you just took volumes of steroids or you felt like you're in heaven or Just gave birth to a cow
It's normal if you get jealous if somebody else has the same copy as you or they got a limited edition photo of me and you dont have.
Just like when girls are small , they fight for the limited edition barbie doll in Isetan Or young kids for the $9.90 power ranger suit in the pasar malam downstairs
But in order to activate it's effect , you have to do this - Every night before you sleep , look at my picture and like talk to it or touch it you can even sing to it even if you know you sound worst than william hung .
But of course , it comes with it's Terms and Conditions BUT there's only one So don't worry And that is ,
It works only for pimpleless people such as somebody that typed this . So , are you even qualified for this minor factor? If your answer is a 'NO'
I'm utterly dissapointed . . . . . . that you have just missed this once-in-a-life-time chance of enjoying the process of having a pimple free face for the rest of your life.
Blame it on your pimples. Unlike me who don't even have the chance to . . . Damn!
So , handle my pic with care and use your common sense . If you are a dumb blond or still dunno how to use my picture , kindly pass it to someone that has an IQ of 100 or sell it at Ebay at about +/US$29126 .
Thanks.
And i shall say Welcome in advance for people that are urging to thank me for giving them such precious and remarkable piece of knowledge .
-Your True Love ,
GuoLun
5:00 AM
Saturday, March 21, 2009
Oh man . . .
I just realised how life were to sux without me in this world.
There would be no such thing as beauty , charm , charisma , seduction and of course more .
I went to bugis just now and saw WEI DA throwing balls in a competition and i think he scored the highest . Congrats !!
And then the next thing was . . . I was spotted . .
Spotted to represent Hugo Boss as one of their catalog model .
Oh man . . I'm like so hot ok . and this kind of crap is not suited for me. It's like the fourth or fifth time i was spotted to be a model??
The pay without an agent was like -/$900 for a project.
LOL
and it takes like unlimited time?
waste my talent. Wait til I'm spotted for a World class one then I'll accept .
And that stupid guy was like a dog begging me to join him. It's so irritating
Imagine "C'mon , It's Hugo Boss . You get paid you know?" "Please think twice . I'll give you my name card" " why not do a try out. It's fun and free and does no harm" "You might get famous . You're so young and filled with potential " Blah blah blah
He bug you like 30mins and i was like ignoring him but he still continue being a dog
OMG .
You piss me off
Anyway , those previous company that spotted me were
Playboy , Gola , Some wedding thing and some perfume thing
-GuoLun
nots
9:05 AM
Friday, March 20, 2009
OK i changed my skin
I know it's sexy like me
and the process was kinda funny and dumb .
Thanks Heede and JingKai
OK . . .
So i was bored just now and i decided to watch chris croker's vid again. And i chanced upon this real tard video
I'm gonna share it .
The Genre of this Video is HORROR So , dun watch it alone or at night.
It might cause some serious insomnia or nightmares.
LOL
he is like doing some babaric ritual . Is like turning straight guys into gays.
Oh man . . .
After watching this is like getting some incurable depression . . .
For some reasons his golden hair and actions reminds me of mong mong. LOL
Hmmm . .
I think that's the trend in america Topless dance Cures depression .
cool.
-GuoLun
Your rockin' ma boat
7:34 AM
Thursday, March 19, 2009
Sian la.
Watch this crap video . It made me laugh .
LOL.
lets try not eating and pray to god to make us full And drink water only . LOL
you can go see his other gay videos too. but dont get traumatised cus some of his videos is like a IMH gay trying desperately to tell the whole world he is gay
And i dunno why nowadays i feel like raping girls.
Beware !!!
I might go your house and rape you if you are a girl!!!!
better lock your door or wear 3 pairs of shorts ( although it wont change anything)
And host more class gathering leh. Or i'll be dead bored and cant let you guys have the honor to see me When is the next birthday?
Remember to tell me and 241 !!!
-GuoLun
He who is poor is not without a cent , but without a DREAM
8:53 AM
Wednesday, March 18, 2009
Yesterday was fun.
I went for my yuying gathering at pasir ris. To those spoilers who insit on not coming , you guys just missed your one and only chance of my free autograph and photo taking session .
OK , so , it was a BUNGALOW
it was nearly as cool as me. That only reminds me of my toy house when i was a baby .
When i got to pasir ris , the sec4s were also having BBQ And they were only having PITS not BUNGALOW
hahahaha
so noob. And we were only paying $7 and you guys $8 LOL Nvm , that's cus special people have special discounts .
And the worst thing , some thought a mega celeb like me is going for their BBQ PIT . but too bad , i am going for my BUNGALOW
Let me tell u what so great about my BUNGALOW. There's Nintendo Wii , Xbox , Aircon , Bedroom , A sofa that's longer than me by 3 times , Karaoke , Indoor BBQ pit , Balcony , Toilet and carpark.
And what's ther to eat was - Salad , Orange juice , Stingray , Satay , Chicken , Prawn , Potatoe , bee hoon , some desert that looks like kiwi juice .
And the VIP set -Wild Kangaroo thigh meat , Ice blended panda's gut , tortoise stew with chrysanthemum roots , Steamed eel's head in pandan curry , Hamster's brain and tuna liver mix special , Cat's tongue with dog's paw spicy ramen , grilled salmon with black sesame ,Stir-Fried scrambled toad's egg and the soup of the day was Bat's head dipped in pig's blood with Winter melon juice .
And then those gays were playing winning eleven like there's no tmr. I think they play from 12 midnight to 11am
Lucky i was clever enough to sleep on the BED inside an AIRCON room.
BUT before that , i went to watch this movie called " Coming Soon" at 2350hrs with my gay partner Kelvin. And what's more , we were sitting at the most back seat and it's 2 sitter . lol
Anyway , the show sux. It's supposed to be horror . But in the end it's "shocking"
I hate those show that's supposed to be horror but in the end shock you with the sound system . It's pure dumb.
The ghost name is Chaba . which sounds stupid.sounds like Ali Ba Ba who's afraid of a ghost name chaba although it looks like most yuying teachers
And can u believe it ? I was only paying for the last 5secs of the show . Cus that's the most scariest part . I shall not say , go watch yourself.
Then i went back to my BUNGALOW to sleep. HAHA I was sleeping with guowei in a room. it's only me and him hehehehe I wonder did i sleep walk and do smth hehehehe
And ardi , it's natural for a celeb to look like one so , dont bother about saying that i look hot.
The stupid BBQ did not make me full and i went to eat 2 sausage mcmuffin with egg this morning.
And thinking of my training later , it just piss me off . celebs are busy . .
-GuoLun
9:17 PM
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
Walao.
Today i went to Mas Selamat training ground - Escape theme park. But i learnt nothing about escaping.
I think I know how mas selamat escape already . It's so easy . The prison outside got his goldcart. Then he just run to his goldcart and drive to indon la walao
Like that also cant think of .
I am utterly dissapointed . . .
Hai . . .
Why aren't the police force as clever as me ?
They seriously lack of talented people like me man .
And I think when i grow up i want to be the fun fair guy. Cus I like lost $4 to it in like 5 mins.
And is we 5 people play tgt which means $20
and we won nth . And the stupid guy didn't even console me when i lost . . . . Make me even more sad
The thing like so easy but it's hard That thing is to cheat young and innocent kids like me .
Nvm . . .
I am forgiving.
-GuoLun
3:46 AM
Sunday, March 15, 2009
OK. .
I went to my class blog and realised that exactly half of my class did not go into a poly or JC . which is lol
hmm.
Let me share with you guys how's like to be a retainee.
Well , at the start I got this feeling where everyone looked down on me. As time goes by , it slowly disappears but there's still this feeling of people looking down on me.
I don't mind being looked down at , cus I've been looking down on people for years due to my height . lol
When I get good grades , 1st thing that i thought of was that everyone would think that it's natural for a retainee to get this grades.
I think it's only somewhat true .
AND the most important point is that this year is really like DEJA VU . except for some amnesia part like people around you are now gone and new people come which I dont really feel right and of course , very sad .
It's fcking boring. And i cant take it anymore. Pls gimme something else to do !!!
BUT i shall persevere Cus i have to get better than 32 points ! which i think i can .
You wont know how success taste like until after you fail like you never fail before
-GuoLun
10:22 PM
Walao.
at home is so boring.
And i dunno what to do tis holiday.
which means i am going to rot at home for 1 week . .
Hopefully something funny or entertaining comes.
if not i will die.
-GuoLun
3:18 AM
Saturday, March 14, 2009
OMFFFFFFFFFFFFFFG.
That guy seriously piss my ass off.
his face is already enough to piss me off for 10 days
And he barks at me like nobody's business.
I really think that i improved alot compared to last year and that monkey wrench just cant fcking stop pissing me
yea i got a F9 but so wat
compared to last year's straight F
fck u man.
U are like comparing me with the best . did i ever compare you with the best.
you are like a fcking dog that just cant shut your hole you know that you are worst than a gigolo for dogs?
I dont even think you would finally shut your mouth even if i get straight As Until i stuff dog shit into it.
Look at your fcking mirror. I dont even think you are fit to scold me
How successful are you? you are just like any other failure on the streets. Then you put the blame on me On my disability to help.
And you want me to help you clean your pile of dog shit
Fck you.
it's your prob. You keep saying that i am wasting your money I already worked in the holidays and you are not satisfied?
Now you gimme $10 for breakfast recess lunch and dinner? and i am like fcking playing basketball? I need to eat alot ??
Your actions is like shortening my life piss me off to the fcking core.
your face is like the fcking baboon that got raped by a fcking chimpanzee
-GUOLUN
8:28 AM
I am dead bored. and hungry.
Hmmm . .
Show you guys some of my dnt work which i think are pretty cool.
This is a cup holder .
This is supposed to be a serviette and pepper n salt holder
Ornament for visual entertainment and which also scares lizard
Egg.
And finally people appreciate my drawings. unlike my last year DnT teacher who said my drawing sux.
By the way , my product is for scaring lizards as it's primary function. and then the secondary as some sort of ornament or holders . . . etc
Anyway , i think i am out of ideas. Can anyone tell me what's their messiest thing in the kitchen.(eg. cup , spoon)
And . who's going for the sherwin gathering .Cus some malay boys say they are not going and ps me .
-GuoLun
3:07 AM
Friday, March 13, 2009
OMG
I am so fcking happy !!!!
I GOT F9 FOR MY HUMANS!!!!!!!!!!
HAHAHHA
good right.
that's the highest point grade ever.
Actually i passed but i nvr do homework so i fail .
But nvm.
I got C6 for English for some crap reason . I dont wanna care.
And I got C6 for MT which i dunno why. I like fail all the class test n common test i still pass .
And now . . .
THe miracle that fall upon me . . .
COMB SCI - A1 MATHS - A1 DnT - A1
Thanks Thanks i know you guys are proud of me.
it's like I 1st time get A1 ?
I feel so happy . lol
ok nvm .
ltr get the wrong impression that i bragged.
So my L1R4 is 15 ^^
And i think it's better compared to my O lvl lol
which is like
10 plus 10 plus 10 plus 10 minus 8 times 1 plus 0 minus 0
yes
it's 32 .
5:18 AM
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
Damn !
My internal injury reacted yesterday when i was playing happily with my little round bouncy balls . . . it never react before in my life and now i am depressed .
The feeling is like a cow that is force to produce 100000 litres of milk instantly and a underage male chipmunk that is force to give birth to a bunch of gorillas
Anyway, how i got this injury was that i was trying to learn the culture of IMH . So, I sang Ba Ba Black Sheep to the flowers and trees hoping they would dance along .
Then suddenly , out of no where, My Chemical Romance came and gave me a Buddha pluck on my armpit hair which for some serious reasons . . . . . . . feels good .
Then i was hairless on one of my armpit while the other was like a 1000 yr old ginseng smiling at me . it was very pain but i like .
and i was sent to Tan Tock Seng immediately.
After like 10days of non-stop failed attempts of replanting my armpit hair, the doctors said this injury was too advanced to be cured and can only be cured by listening to Cyrus singing Crush By David.Archuleta and Ezra in the background doing the 'leave britney alone' thingy
and that was how my Severe Acute Armpit Syndrome (SAAS) came about. Sad to say , it IS infectious .
So ,if you are around me , please go for regular check ups at your nearest polyclinic on your armpit to see if it grows pink polka dots , your nightmare is your armpit chasing you or your armpit hair starts talking to you . If you got them , kindly play your part and suicide please cus there's like no cure .
If it's your first time suiciding and you dunno how, you can try things like smelling your best friend's armpit when it sweats . It works wonders .
Thanks for your kind understanding.
-GuoLun
6:28 AM
Saturday, March 7, 2009
Waa sian . . .
i dunno y am i so sick today.
and i still continue to play basketball.
i like after every match must go sneeze awhile then resume. . .
and i sneeze like dunno wat.
but i dunno y i feel that i play better when i sick.
maybe they know i sick n dun wan get close me and let me score.
anyway . i think i used like 4 packets of tissue in that court and i litter all the tissues in that court . LOL Now like after snow .
-GuoLun
7:42 AM
Friday, March 6, 2009
OMG
today is the most horrifying day ever.
hopefully it doesnt repeat again !!
I actually wrestled with the world's most dangerous predator !
. . . . the Pigman !!!!!
He looks like this
I dunno how to describe this once in a life time experience But what i can say is I might die if the wrestle last 5 secs longer.
cus he charge at you like kanna possess by a mad wild boar that nvr eat for 1000 years
I think he must see me as a long bean. cus i tall n skinny.
Luckily there is only one Pigman .
If got 2 and they wrestle each other = End of the world . His trademark is fart . and the impact is like tsunami
I think they will like eat everything in their path then do power ranger stunts then innocent people like me will suffer because of Pigman
I shall show u an example ..
OK .
that was only 1% of what i experienced . . .
My life is so tough . . .
but for the sake of people who cant bear to part me ( Leon ) I shall continue living . . . .
-GuoLun
3:23 AM
Thursday, March 5, 2009
Today got funeral outside my school.
Which made me thought of the world's most brilliant money making business ever.
YES the most earning all over the world !!
and the business is to open a coffin shop!
although it sound stupid . but i think only genius like some people can think of this.
See the obituary . In singapore , the size of a red bean. at least 15 people die per day. If one coffin cost only $200 and all those people buy coffin from you , it would be $3000per day.
So , if you open your shop in africa and give 50% discount , you would be the next tycoon but dont get into the situation in slumdog millionaire
See , i am so generous to give away this idea.
there's another job. which is to be the songka monk.
just anyhow chant then get pay already . somore they cfm give you tips
Btw , I wonder how long mong mong hair has become.
i think he is a lion/dog/human/monkey which is called - Liogmankey
beware !!
he bites like a hungry dog bitting your shoe he roars like a peacock singing and he walks like a yeti on the run
-GuoLun
6:07 AM
Tuesday, March 3, 2009
Omg . .
i so long nvr play basketball and i forgot that i will get thirsty after match . . .
But luckily my brain was still functioning and i make good use of my money to buy yogurt HAHAHAHAHAHA
clever right use yogurt to quench .
anyway ,
i got 15/30 for my EL .
which is wtf .
so time to do some finger excercise
Can u imagine being taught by a 50 year old virgin . Nobody can stand the 40 yr old virgin-LGC already . .
man . . 10 years later . . . is what i am getting . . .
she dresses like an African barbarian from the camel shit tribe that is going to BBQ her head
And her voice is wonderful .so awesome . Imagine LGC in 10 years . . . and her voice .
yes .
you get it. future silencer . Kills me without knowing why
She says she got 30yrs experience but i think is crap. Her experience to me is like only less than 30 minutes. 30years still land in my school . what a failure . still want act
I think she is a fan of micheal jackson . thats y her face like do make over from a lorry accident
only she didnt bleach her self . I wonder what happen if she did that . . .
50 year old virgin Pontianak on the loose !!!
OK i shall stop it . incase some adults accidentally hop into my blog . then accidentally read the whole of my post. then accidentally tell somebody then some people antena so long , accidentally know. Then later accidentally make me do stuffs . . .
This is a cup holder .
This is supposed to be a serviette and pepper n salt holder
